#222: Looking Back to Move Forward

[00:00:52] Well, hey there, everybody. This is Heather Moulder of Life and Law. Wow. It is 2026. I don’t know about you, but the older I get, the more true that saying about how time flies really is. 2025 is pretty much a blur. It was a very, very fast year. Perhaps that’s partly because I have a high school student who is very active, and our time is always taken by something.

But yeah, it’s been an amazing past year. Today we are going to go through my biggest lessons from the year 2025. And really my biggest lessons that I learned both personally and professionally. And I want to bring it to you. I do this every year around this time. If you’ll note, usually it’s at the very end. It’s the last episode of the year. This year, it, it did not make it. I was sick over the holidays and that gave me a lot of time to think and actually add to these lessons.

[00:02:04] So in some ways that was a good thing.

Why The Year-End Review Process/Lessons Learned?

Let’s just get right into the lessons from 2025 and just FYI, if you’ve never been here for one of these episodes, yes, I do this annually.

These are the lessons I learned. But I’m here to teach them to you and to talk to you about them because I do think that we all learn these things again and again.

And oftentimes if somebody shares with you some of the failures they’ve had, the struggles they’ve had, the aha moments they’ve had through the struggles and the difficulties and then the lessons learned from what they’ve been through the previous year, it’s a lot easier for you then to think, huh? Well, how might that apply to me? What did I learn? Did something similar happen? And it spurs all kinds of ideas.

[00:02:51] I think it’s a really important thing to do around this time of year, either at the end of a year or the very beginning of a year. As we are setting our goals, as we are looking forward, we don’t want to jump too quickly into new goals without doing a look back.

And I will say this, I have a resource that I’ve given out before that has a bunch of questions for how to do a really great look back for how to look back at where you began versus where you ended. How to be honest about the struggles and the difficulties and the mistakes and failures even, and learn from them. And then how to take that and put it into your goal planning for the year ahead so that you can what I like to call, fail forward. Because a failure isn’t really a failure unless you let it just be and you learn nothing from it. If you learn from it and you bring it forth and and move forward with what you’ve learned, it wasn’t really a failure, now was it?

So that is the purpose for this. And if you would like to get your hands on that resource, just reach out to me. It is currently not in my Success Vault, but that will be remedied hopefully pretty soon. Probably not by the time you hear this, because I’m actually recording this the day before I release it.

[00:04:14] I was so sick I just could not record this until now. And which is very odd for me because typically I record these a month or more in advance. I’m a planner, y’. All.

That being said, that’s going to be changing moving forward in some ways, which is one of the lessons learned which we will get into shortly. But if you would like to get that before I’m able to get it into the Success Vault, if you are a part of my newsletter and have access to the Success Vault, then please just reach out to me via email and I’m hopeful to get it in there by the end of the week or at least by the beginning of next week.

[00:04:48] And by the way, if you don’t get my newsletter, highly recommend you sign up for it. A little plug for that. I will put a space in the show notes for you to access how to sign up for the Newsletter Anybody who joins my newsletter has access to my Success Vault, which has my best resources in there and I do update it quarterly. You would be wise to get my newsletter because my newsletter has other stuff in it. It has stuff that’s not covered anywhere else on how to create a life and legal career that you actually enjoy. All right, so that’s enough of the plug. Let’s get into the lessons learned from last year.

Know When It’s Time To Pivot or Change Something

So lesson number one, know when to say it’s time for a change or pivot, especially if you’ve already made a change. So oftentimes we make changes, changes to our business or life that we believe very strongly are needed.

[00:05:48] And oftentimes they are, regardless of what happens with that change. But sometimes that change that we choose isn’t necessarily the right one. We. We need a couple of steps to get to the right place. Well, that definitely happened to us in 2425. So this was a personal lesson. Back in 2024, my youngest son, Noah, came to my husband and I and said, I want to move schools.

And that was a big change because he had been at that same school since he was two years old. It was the school that our oldest son graduated from and had been at since he was the age of four. It’s a wonderful school. We absolutely love that school. But it was no longer a good fit for Noah for a lot of reasons that I’m not going to bore you with, But a lot of it related to his sports. And he also wanted a more religious school.

And so we went through the tough process of looking around and taking all the tests and applying and picking what we thought was the best place for him. He started there, and it seemed like a decent fit at first, but by the spring of 2025, it became very clear it was not a fit, and it wasn’t a fit for our entire family. It wasn’t a fit for Noah, and it wasn’t a fit for us. And it doesn’t make it a bad place, by the way. It just wasn’t the right fit fit for him.

[00:07:07] Now, we humans don’t like change. Making that initial change was really tough. So when we make a change and we’re going about that change and we’re in that new place, it’s really easy to ignore all the warning signs and all the trouble spots that say maybe this wasn’t the right one because we don’t want to go. Well, did I make a mistake? Oh, my gosh, I failed. Maybe we need to go back.

What are we doing? Maybe we just made the wrong decision and now we have to pick something else. And it’s a whole process. For anybody who’s been through changing private schools, it’s a big process, and it is a pain in the butt. It’s not fun. Also, by the time we realized this, we were past all the deadlines for the normal application period. Now, that doesn’t mean you can’t find a school, but it makes it even harder. Harder, and it narrows the options down. Because only so many schools will still listen to you and actually take an application that late in the game. And so we were really behind the eight ball, and we kind of pushed up against it for a couple of weeks, trying to convince ourselves as a family, well, let’s just do one more year.

[00:08:21] But some things happened, and sometimes I think God’s talking to us, or whether it’s God, the universe, whatever you want to call it, some things happened that made it very clear, no, this really isn’t the right place. And so after that couple of weeks of going back and forth, we talked as a family, and we were like, no, it’s time. It’s time to move on. It’s time to find that next spot. And we went into over, like, massive action mode.

The good news is we found the exact right place for Noah and for our family. It’s the perfect fit. And it’s not a perfect place, by the way. And every place has its imperfections. Everyone has their imperfections. But it really is the best possible fit for him from an academic standpoint, from a religious standpoint, and what he wanted from a people standpoint, from a sports standpoint, from a growth standpoint, it’s been the best thing ever. And the thing that I would say here that I’ve always.

Well, I wouldn’t say I’ve always, but I have learned the hard way over the years is this. Listen to your body.

[00:09:33] When you feel it internally, warning signs, big-time flags are going off. Alarm bells really are going off for you. Listen to that inner body. That is what ultimately stopped us all. I felt it.

Noah felt it. My husband felt it and got us to come together and go, okay, we did need a change. We picked the wrong place. It’s time to find a new one. The other thing is, listen to that inner voice that says, whoa, wait a second, something’s off. We have several inner voices, y’. All. We have that inner voice that’s like, well, don’t really want to make a change, so.

And that one loves to take over, but there’s another voice that’s trying to get out. Often when things are going on that really are off. And when we have those feelings inside of our body, whether it’s, you know, the shoulders, the muscles, the stomach, that just sick feeling that you get when you know something is wrong or off that you need to address, there’s another inner voice in there.

Let it speak, and don’t be afraid to hear it out. So lesson one, know when to say it’s time, whether it’s for a change, a new change or a pivot after making a change. Listen to your body. Listen to that inner voice trying to tell you, hey, you need to listen to me. Something is off.

Know When To Double Down (Because It’s Working)

[00:11:08] Lesson number two, know when to double down on what is working instead of going into a new, different big direction that seems fun and interesting and a new challenge.

So this came up with respect to my business. For about three and a half, four years now, keep coming back to this idea of planning and hosting a summit. And at the beginning of 2025, I actually goal planned and decided to host a summit. Now, anybody who’s been following me for the last year knows I didn’t do it.

A couple of months into the year, I halted that process. And here’s why. A summit probably does not make sense for me in my business, at least not at this time. So for anybody who does not know what a summit is, just a quick, brief explanation is. A summit is when you host an online event where you bring together guests and talk around some type of specific topic. So for me, it was going to be legal marketing, a legal marketing summit. And so I was going to have guests on, we were going to talk about very specific things, you know, maybe Speaking online videos, LinkedIn, all these different things.

[00:12:28] And it’s kind of been the rage in the online world for a couple of years now. It might actually be dying down now, but it’s been out there. And I’ve been prodded over and over again by a lot of online folks that I know that I should host one, I should do this. And I kind of fell into that trap of, oh, that’s the next big thing, that’s the next big step, I should do it. And convinced myself that I should do it. But every time I started to look at it, I questioned, well, how is this going to work with the podcast? I already host a podcast. How is this all that different? It’s like the podcast. I already do all of this stuff. I mean, granted, I don’t have as many experts on at once, but I do have experts on, on these topics, and I speak to these topics. So what is this going to add?

And so then I started questioning, well, how would I market it? How would it be different? Because the whole thing around a summit is you’ve got to get people to sign up for it, which means they’re signing up for your list. The whole point of it is to grow your email list.

And I ended up saying, you know what? This isn’t different enough than the podcast and the topics that I’m thinking about. I could cover really well on the podcast and I’ve already started covering some of the topics that I was going to cover in the summit, and I’m going to continue to cover those topics here on the podcast. It just didn’t make sense for my business.

[00:13:53] Now, what did make sense is to double down on what was already working, which was this podcast, my LinkedIn presence, my networking, to do more speaking and workshops that made a lot more sense.

[00:14:08] That’s what I’d already been doing. And what I realized is I was falling prey to that whole bright shiny object syndrome, where this new big amazing thing that sounds so much fun and the summit itself would have been fun. All the work goes into it. Not as much, I don’t mind it, but it’s not as much fun. But the summit itself, you know, hosting people, talking to people, the adrenaline rush of doing it, that part would have been fun. But it wasn’t really worth the payoff that I would get given all the other assets I already have going. So I decided to double down on what was all already working to achieve my revenue goals for the year. And guess what? I achieved and then exceeded them. So know when what is actually working is. And you can just double down on that. You do not have to do the brand new shiny thing that people are doing. You do not have to do what the partner down the hall is doing just because it’s working for them.

Know what works for you and double down on that.

Know When Not To Follow The So-Called “Rules”

[00:15:14] All right, lesson number three, know when to not follow the so called rules.

So for me, the rules were the rules of growth and scaling my business, growing my revenues. Typically when you grow your business, you have to quote, unquote, scale, which means hiring people. And it means doing things like the summit, right? It means going bigger.

But sometimes that’s not what you actually want. So I had a moment, kind of an epiphany halfway through last year where I realized that very much like what happened to me when I was a partner, I didn’t want to get too much bigger. Yes, I wanted to grow my revenues last year, and yes, this year I want to grow from last year, but I want small incremental growth. I don’t want massive scaling and I honestly don’t want the million dollar business that a lot of the other online folks want want. That’s just not important to me. It’s not needed. I don’t want that kind of work. I don’t really want to run a whole business of people that I have to Manage. I might upon occasion, you know, utilize external help like virtual assistants on a part time basis or people to come in and help me with very specific things. But those would be one offs. I don’t want to scale and get massively big.

[00:16:38] And this was something that I kind of already knew in the back of my mind yet I hadn’t really fully addressed it proactively. And halfway through last year I needed to. Because I needed to sit down and say, okay, wait, why was it that I was going after this summit so fully? What was it that I was trying to do? I was trying to massively grow my list. Well, why did I want to massively grow my list? So that I could, you know, scale my business. Well, do I really want to scale my business? No, I don’t. I make good enough money. I’m happy with where I am.

I have an eye in a couple of years when Noah goes off to college and I don’t have kids in the house anymore to do more speaking. That involves traveling because I very much enjoy speaking in workshops.

[00:17:27] Why don’t I work more towards getting that going in the next couple of years as opposed to all this online stuff? I like to be with people more. I want to actually build a business that is part online, but very much also with people. That was my epiphany. And for that business, it doesn’t have to be so big. I can make a certain amount of money, make a good living, be very happy, and I don’t have to scale.

Which also meant I don’t have to follow the so called scaling rules, rules.

[00:18:03] So it’s quote unquote, the rules because you see everybody doing it and that’s the next thing. In the online world, we’re always talking about the next thing, the next step, wanting to get to a next level. But what if you don’t want that? That happened to me also when I was building my legal practice.

So again, step back and think about, okay, what is it that I want?

[00:18:28] What is my long-term vision for this business, this practice and what does that mean for my goals this year and what do I want to do? You don’t have to follow the so called rules just because other people want you to build a million book and then get that million to 2 and get that 2 to 4 and get that 4 to 6 and get that 6 to 10.

Other people are always going to want more from you. Those are their rules, not yours. Know your vision, create your rules from that vision and go after that.

Allow Flexibility For More Creativity

[00:19:03] Lesson four, be more flexible.

So this past year felt a little boring in some areas of my business, primarily in the marketing aspect. And it’s really interesting. I mentioned at the beginning of this podcast that I got sick over the holidays.

We got some type of flu thing going through our house. Right after Thanksgiving I got really sick, developed into a secondary infection. I had a horrible cough. It basically had me in bed for two and a half, three weeks, which was horrible in some ways, but was actually really needed. And it was time away. It was time away from marketing, it was time away from LinkedIn. It forced me to really think about what I want and what I’m finding fun and interesting and challenging, what I’m not finding fun and interesting or challenging in my business.

[00:19:59] And I realized that I’ve gotten really bored, especially on LinkedIn, which is a little weird because LinkedIn was one of my favorite places for many years. And what I’ve realized is I was also following the rules of LinkedIn. They’ve been changing, if you haven’t noticed, the last few years, as far as how to get your stuff seen, how to play the algorithm, well, guess what? No more.

I’m done with that. Now I write my own posts. I don’t use a lot of AI for writing itself, but I do have some tools that have helped me to analyze past posts, what’s performed well, what has not, how to change up some things as far as topics goes, you know, style way to, you know, the types of things that people like to hear and how they like to hear it.

[00:20:48] So that has shaped what I’ve talked about and how I’ve talked about it. And I’ve pretty much decided that I’m letting go of that because it has made it a chore, it has made it unenjoyable for me and I don’t feel as creative. I want to talk about the things that truly matter to me and my people, my clients and those of you out there who are like minded to them. And that’s not necessarily what the algorithm will reward.

[00:21:21] So I want to put a little more creativity and flexibility back into how I post what I post about. And I’m going to have a lot more like I always pre plan a lot. Like that’s just I’m a very organized person and to stay up on things, I get a month or two sometimes ahead. I’m still going to do some of that, but I’m going to have space in there and I’m going to move more around and when world events happen that I actually think are important to talk about because they’re important to our own happiness and fulfillment and our ability to live our lives as best we can. I’m going to talk about those things instead of not.

The reason I haven’t is because I feel like, well, I have this schedule and I’ll do it later. And then later too much time’s past. Now it seems stupid. So there’s going to be a lot more flexibility and creativity in my LinkedIn posting. There’s also going to be more flexibility and creativity in this podcast and in my newsletter. Again, I. I preplan everything and I’m going to still do that because it allows me to ensure I get out a weekly product, but I’m going to save one a month that I’m not going to put out until it’s a day or two in advance.

And that way, if I need to come in and record something because something big happened in the world or something, some epiphany came to a client that I want to share with you immediately because I think it’s really relevant, I’m going to do it then.

[00:22:47] So the lesson is, allow yourself not to get so bogged down by this is how it’s done. The consistency, the schedule, the, you know, planning that you get bored. Ensure there’s some flexibility in there, ensure that you have some room for creativity.

That’s what I’m doing. And hopefully you will be a beneficiary of it and you will enjoy that flexibility and creativity. Because I’ll come in here a little bit more excited about some of the topics because they’ll feel very timely and I’ll come in on LinkedIn, very excited and happy to be there because of the way I’m showing up, as opposed to just doing the same old, same old.

Be As Intentional With Money As You Are With Time, Energy & Your Goals

[00:23:33] Final lesson, be intentional around money, what you’re saving, what and how you’re spending, planning for the future.

This is something that as I’m getting older, of course I’m very cognizant of, and I’ve always been cognizant of.

But my conversation pretty recently, actually last month, I think it was with a guest who is a financial planner, really had me thinking about how I can be even more intentional about what I’m spending, where I’m spending, how I’m spending, and not just personally. Yes, personally, it’s interesting to me. I have always been very intentional about my personal savings, investment and spending and I will continue to be.

I haven’t always done that with my business.

[00:24:35] So when I was practicing law, I did not spend money much and sometimes I should have spent some to help me out in the marketing and the sales and you know, sponsorship areas and also for coaching. It would have benefited me to have a coach at one point in time, but I was always a bit of a penny pincher and never wanted to spend that money and I regretted it later.

And then even in this, this business it’s, it’s interesting. As I’ve looked back after that interview, I looked back at this business and how I spent the month my money the last five years, especially since my business has taken off the last three to four years and I have become more intentional, which is great. But I’m still not quite as intentional as I’d like to be because sometimes I fall prey to marketing gimmicks and spend money that I don’t really need to be spending and I don’t use those services or tools that I spend money on. And thankfully they’re always pretty small value spends but they add up and why spend it if I’m not going to use it? And then there are other things that really require more of an investment that I’ve shied away from have not spent money on. That changes this year.

There are a couple of things I’m going to make investments in from a networking and marketing perspective to help up level what I’m doing already and to help me be more intentional about my plans for the future of this business.

[00:26:11] So the lesson here is when you do that annual look back and then when you do your annual look forward, be sure not to leave off the money part. Where have I invested? Where have I not? Where could I? Why? Why not? What fears relate to this? Why am I holding back? Why have I spent here? What did I get out of it? Like be really intentional around that piece because I think it’s really easy for us to forget that we must invest in ourselves, but we also need to do it very intentionally in ourselves personally and in our own businesses.

Okay, so those are the lessons that I learned from the year 2025. Hopefully you will have learned something from me today. I will put into the show Notes a direct link to the resource that I mentioned earlier.

If you are a member of my newsletter and you can access the Success Vault, I hope to have that in there by the end of this week and we will be back with you next week. Bye for now.