#225: There Are Many Ways to Meditate (Meditation Manual for Busy Lawyers)

[00:01:20] Welcome to Life & Law. This is your host, Heather Moulder. And I I am really excited about today's episode. I know I say I'm excited almost every single week, but this week I'm especially excited because this is something that has been percolating within my mind for probably the past two years. And it's something that has felt a little overwhelming to cover because there is so much to meditation and there are so many different ways to meditate. And I honestly wasn't quite sure how I wanted to cover meditation.

A couple of years ago I had an amazing guest, Lexlee Overton, who is a former practicing lawyer who now actually teaches meditation and mindfulness to lawyers and how to utilize meditation, especially within the lawyer-trained brain.

[00:02:13] And that was a really excellent episode. It was probably the best way for me to introduce meditation to you because she has such a powerful story, and she even did a one-minute or less than one-minute meditation right on that episode. So if you have not heard that and it has been a while since that one came out, it was a couple of years ago. I highly recommend that after today's you go back and listen to that because she goes even deeper into the benefits, and I think her story as to why she started meditation and ultimately what ended up having her come out of the law and helping lawyers with meditation and mindfulness will really resonate with a lot of you.

The anxiety, the stress, the overwhelm that she felt and how she applied it to her life. So again, please, after today's episode, go find that episode. I will put a link in the show notes.

The Benefits of Meditation

But let's just quickly get into the benefits of meditation because I find that people generally hear about a couple of them, but they don't realize all of the benefits as to why meditation can be so powerful. Benefits that I think you will agree will help stop not just immediate stress and the stress response, but will help retrain your mind in a way that will be more impactful, not just to your stress levels, but to your day-to-day. How you think, the way you think, the way you process your thoughts, which has a huge impact on stress, overwhelm, anxiety, but also performance, focus, and presence. And I will say this, one of the things I hear the most from younger, mid-level, and even senior attorneys is the need and desire to be more present.

[00:04:11] We often have wandering minds, and I think a lot of that is attributable to how we live these days with technology, with email, and how we have structured our lives around the technology that we have. It's not all the technology's fault, it's how we've chosen to structure our lives and our work around it because we're always available and we've kind of programmed our brains to be more adhd, like even for those of us who technically don't have adhd.

And that is very worrisome. It's worrisome for society and culture; it's worrisome for the long term. But it's also worrisome for attorneys who need the ability to have time and space to get more creative. You can't problem-solve to the best of your ability. You can't be really creative if you don't have space and if your mind always feels cluttered.

So that is really what we're getting at. This is why meditation can be so powerful.

[00:05:15] So let's get into some of the proven benefits and frankly some of the things I've seen personally, both within my own life and within my clients.

Self-Awareness

[00:05:25] The first one is practicing meditation. And really any form of mindfulness and meditation is a form of mindfulness, helps you to become more self aware, aware of your thinking, aware of your beliefs, aware of your thoughts and feelings. And if you've been following me for any time, you know how important this is. This is around mindset. You must be self aware around thoughts and feelings in order to be more responsible, more, you know, in order to catch them, to know when you've been triggered to Stop reactionary responses, which of course then cause more stress. Right.

So being more mindful, especially within the meditative practice, helps you to become more self-aware, which then opens up more possibilities for processing them. And instead of being held hostage by your feelings and held hostage by beliefs and thoughts, it trains your brain to be less emotionally reactive, which means more calm, clear thoughts, thinking.

Presence

[00:06:35] Another benefit that I know is incredibly important for us lawyers is it helps you to be more present in the moment. So the practice of meditation is primarily for that, that immediate practice forces you to be more present. You have a focal point, you are focusing in on something.

So you're paying attention to not just what's going on within you, but also to bodily sensations, to the people and the environment around you. Sometimes it can very much depend on the type of meditation you're doing or even a mindfulness practice that you're doing.

And I would just say this is the biggest complaint I hear from lawyers. I can't be present when I'm at work. I'm thinking about the fight I had this morning or what's going on with my kids latest chemistry test. And when I'm at home, I'm thinking about the client problem I'm trying to solve. And most attorneys feel like their minds are often all over the place. Kind of like a pinball inside of a pinball machine. No control. And it's just kind of like being pushed around.

Meditation helps take more control over that helps to retrain your brain to be more focused and present, to have more of an attention span, and not be that ADHD brain that we seem to be training our brains to do.

Intentionality

[00:07:58] Another benefit, and this is frankly a benefit of the things we've already talked about, is it helps you to get out of autopilot.

We tend to go into autopilot reactions, right? We just have certain thoughts, we have certain reactions to things, we do certain things in certain ways. We live on autopilot for a lot of things. Well, a good meditation and frankly any mindfulness practice, but especially meditation, because of becoming more self aware, because of the awareness to others around you, because of the awareness to other things that are going on that could impact you. And then because also of the ability to be more present and focused and attentive helps you to get out of autopilot, helps you to notice more fully other people, their emotions. This helps with eq, with emotional intelligence, which we talked about recently in respect of executive presence.

This will help you with those things. So yes, meditation can help you be more present within as an executive, too. Have better executive presence, have better eq.

[00:09:15] It also helps when I talk about getting out of autopilot. We take a lot for granted and this is something I learned when I had cancer through my cancer journey.

There are a lot of little things to be thankful for, to be grateful for in life, and small, simple pleasures that we take advantage of every day, but we don't actually notice how helpful they are to our mood and to the experience of living.

When you become more self-aware and then pull out to be more aware of your surroundings, when you become more attentive and more present in the moment, you start to notice those little things, and it opens up more possibility for gratitude. Which by the way, it's is a key. If you can learn to see more of those things and then be grateful for and truly appreciate them. It drastically improves your mood and drastically improves your perception of your own life and the experience you have. So it makes life better.

Better Sleep

[00:10:20] Something else that we know can be drastically improved from a meditation and mindfulness practice, and especially for meditation, is improved sleep. This is something that I think a lot of lawyers take for granted when we get good sleep, and we just don't get good enough sleep often enough.

So if nothing else, maybe you try this out so that you can improve your sleep. Because we all know there are real physical benefits to getting good sleep. And when I say good sleep, enough of it at night (length), but also style of sleep. Like, are you waking up a lot at night, are you sleeping well, are you dreaming appropriately? All of that gets impacted, and really meditation can help with that. So something you might try.

And I've noticed that a lot of lawyers who try meditation often try to stick it at the beginning of their day. I would actually suggest that if you are just trying it out, or if you tried it out before and you did it that way and it didn't work well for you, that maybe you try it towards the end of the day. Because a really nice meditation towards the end of the day, as part of your wind-down routine, can drastically improve your sleep and can really be a good, healthy part of preparing your body and mind for sleep.

And something I would note, I've noted here already that great sleep means better physical health. It also means better mental health. Sleep impacts everything. It impacts not just the physiology, but also your mental and emotional state. So try out meditation towards the end of the day as part of your wind down routine to improve your your sleep.

Stop the Stress Response

[00:12:04] Okay, the final benefit, and there are a lot of Other benefits, but this is the last one I'm going to cover for today. Meditation helps stop, like just stop your stress response.

So it helps you get control when you know that chaotic brain starts to go down that winding path of oh my gosh, this is crazy. How are we in such chaos, and we want to speed up and speeding up is the stress response within us. It's fight or flight going on. Well, practicing meditation itself, just the breath work of meditation and the refocus of meditation stops that stress response.

[00:12:44] What's going on is inside of your amygdala, and it lowers the stress response in the amygdala so that you can again become more self-aware and start making better and different choices and get out of reactivity and into a more rational response phase.

Okay, so those are some of my absolute favorite benefits for the practice of meditation and also frankly, other mindfulness. But today we're really going to talk about meditation specifically.

Common Objections to Meditation

So before we get into the 10 ways that I would like you to know about for meditation, and there are technically some more ways, but I think these are the top 10 that most lawyers are going to be comfortable with giving a try. Before we get to that, I want to address some common objections.

Bad At It (Don't Like It)

[00:13:34] And probably the most common goes under the realm of, well, I'm bad at it.

And this comes from, well, I just don't like it. Also, usually the people who tell me they don't like meditating, it's because they have misconceptions around what meditation is and they also think they're bad at it. And a lot of it comes from they're bad at it.

We lawyers don't like to be bad at anything. We're perfectionists, we're high achievers. And so if we feel like we're not good at something, we don't go all in. We don't try it so much. Right. So for anybody who says it's too woo, this is, it's just too woo for me. There are so many ways in which to meditate and I want you to keep listening because I've got a lot of different types, 10 types, to be specific.

I guarantee you can find something within those 10 types that you could get comfortable with and that could work for you.

It Takes Too Long

[00:14:26] The other response that I hear under this, I'm bad at meditating. Well, it takes too long, and I don't have the time or the wherewithal or the energy or the mental. I just don't want to do that. Let go of that. You don't have to meditate for 30 minutes, 20 minutes, 12 minutes, or even 10 minutes. You can start with one or two minutes and build up from there. Should you choose to. Okay. Should you choose to.

My Mind Wanders (Can't Do It)

[00:14:53] The other thing that I hear probably the most is my mind wanders, and I'm terrible at it because my mind is wandering all the time. Well, let me lay your fears here. You're not bad at it. This is about practice, not perfection, number one. And the thing to understand and know about meditation is that part of the benefit comes from the length of the long-term consistent practice over time.

You're training your brain to notice when it has wandered and then pull it back to a focal point. Every time you notice and you pull it back to whatever your focal point is, depending on the type of meditation that you're doing, you are retraining your brain.

That is good, that is what you want. And the more you do it, the better you get at it. Now, not immediately. You're not going to all of a sudden. If your mind wanders 10 times in the course of a 30 seconds or a minute, you're not going to be at a one wander, you know, every five minutes, two weeks later. It doesn't work that way, like with anything. Right.

But you are going to retrain it.

[00:16:04] So I want you to get away from that. There's no such thing as being bad at meditating. It is a practice, it is a long term practice and the benefits are many. Even if your mind is wandering, it's okay. The thing I would say is don't judge. The worst thing you can do is beat yourself up for your mind having wandered. So anytime you're in a meditative practice and you notice that your mind has wandered, first off, I like to notice. Why is it wandered? Sometimes it's trying to tell you something.

Sometimes. I mean, I think we often think mind wandering in and of itself is a bad thing. And it is not. Your mind actually needs to wander sometimes. It's part of creativity. It's part of how we process the things that are going on inside of our mind. It's when your brain is trying to figure out stuff.

So it's not a bad thing. And maybe it needed to wander. So notice what it wandered to. And then after you've noticed, if it's not important or even if it is, and you've made a note, a mental note of it so you can come back to it after your practice is over, I want you to then have a focal point. Right? You'll have a focal point. Bring it Back.

[00:17:13] That's all you need to do. Notice it and then bring it back. And you may want. Sometimes I've noticed that people have phrases or words. Mine is wandered. I will say either inside to myself or even out loud, wandered. And then I'll bring it. That helps train my brain to. Once I've said that, it's time to go back to the focal point. That's all you need. Another note here is if you find that your mind does tend to wander when you are meditating again, it will get better the more you do it. But initially, if you're finding that it's noticing things that are actually quite important and you don't want to forget them. I have found just having a notebook and a pen next to me when that happens or I'm noticing that happens, sometimes it happens in, you know, when certain things are going on at certain periods within certain periods of my life. And I'll just write it down and then I just get back to my meditative practice. So there is no wrong here. That's what I'm trying to tell you. It's okay.

There Is One "Right" Way (& I'm Not Doing That)

[00:18:15] The other thing that I hear a lot is, well, I don't do it right.

There is this thinking that I find in a lot of people who haven't really meditated a whole lot or studied it a lot. Even some people who have meditated and have kind of lobbed onto one type, maybe because that's what they learned or that's how they learned it. Initially they think, well, this is the way.

And then after a while they get bored with it or they wish they could do it another way. Well, guess what? You can. There is no one way to meditate. Okay?

[00:18:51] Breath. Work in and of itself for just a minute or two. That's a form of meditation and it works. There are so many different ways in which to meditate, which we are going to get into starting in a few minutes. What I want you to do is think of all these ways of meditation as tools within your toolbox. Try out the ones that sound the most interesting to you. See how they feel. Give them some time. See how they work for you. Try others, and then also just have them there. Because sometimes specific scenarios call for different methodologies.

So they're tools within your toolbox. Use them as you can. Play around with them. There is no one right way. And even if you find something that typically works most for you, it doesn't mean it's the only way for you. So play around with it like kids, right? We lose the art of play. As we get older, which I find sad, and I want you to not do that. Think of these types of things, meditation and mindfulness.

You can play with them. They can actually be fun and interesting and fun challenges for you. So start to think of them in that way.

Types of Meditations

[00:20:02] Okay, so before again, we move on to my top 10 ways for you to get started. I want to go through two different things, the types of meditation that are really out there. So there's something called guided meditation versus unguided meditation. And this is kind of your first step when you get started on, well, what kind of meditation do I want to try out? Or as a tool within your toolbox, what, which one would work best for me, given my current situation, circumstances, feelings, emotions, thoughts, etc.

Guided Meditations

So guided meditation is when someone guides you through the basic steps of the practice that you're actually doing.

[00:20:47] So it can be in person, but it also can be like a meditation app, like Insight Timer, Headspace, or the Calm app. This type of meditation is very, very useful for beginners because there is an experienced teacher who is guiding you through that particular practice.

[00:21:07] Most guided meditations will lead you through a technique of some sort, and they'll identify the technique that they're using, their meditation technique. They will then explain as you go how the mind behaves during a meditation, like what's going on in your mind, what might happen, how to experience it, how you know what to do if certain things happens. And then sometimes they'll even suggest how to integrate the technique that you're using into your everyday life on your own as well. So that is a guided meditation, and it is a great way to get started if you've never done it.

I will note that some of my lawyers, I've noticed, don't love guided meditations.

And when they tell me why they don't like it, it typically relates to they take a little longer when you're guided. Usually they're more in the 5 plus minutes stage. Now you can find some that are around 3 minutes. Usually not a lot of good guided meditations are going to be less than three minutes.

So that is one knock on them sometimes.

And then also I also, I often hear that it can be a little uncomfortable to have to listen to somebody and you don't always agree with what they're saying or the way they're saying it. And I would just say try out a couple of guided meditations.

[00:22:23] There are differences in teachers. I have found some teachers that are like nails on a chalkboard for me and others that I absolutely love. So just because you find a guided meditation that you don't really like, doesn't mean you're gonna dislike them all. Try out other styles and other people to find your fit.

Unguided Meditations

Now let's get to unguided. So unguided meditation is more of a silent meditation. You're meditating alone, you're meditating without somebody there to explain the process and walk you through each step. An unguided can be as simple as sitting in a quiet room and just paying attention to bodily sensations, or counting breaths, or counting sheep, or paying attention to the thoughts that are coming to you for a set period of time.

[00:23:09] It can also utilize some of the techniques that you learn through guided practice. So you can learn through guided practice what works for you or what you enjoy the most and take that and utilize it on your own in an unguided meditation.

Calming vs. Insight Meditations

Okay, so the other differential point that I want to make sure you understand is there's a difference in what's called a calming meditation, or samatha, or an insight meditation, vipassana.

So a calming meditation, the whole goal for that is to calm your mind and body, bring back more focused attention, and eventually, hopefully develop more twink tranquility and a more peaceful state of mind.

[00:23:59] So calming meditations often involve focusing in on something very simple, an object of some sort, or your breath. And then anytime you notice that your attention has wandered, pulling your attention back to the object or the breath work that you were doing. So the function is to stabilize and quiet your mind.

This helps to create that foundation for deeper insight that we're going to get into in a minute. But sometimes you absolutely need this first to be able to move on. So even most insight meditations start with this, but they go beyond it.

And many of my clients focus primarily on calming meditations, at least at first, because this is what they need most. They want to calm their mind. They need it when the moment is really, you know, harried and chaotic. They utilize it to step back into and kind of regain composure. So that's where you would use a calming meditation the most.

It's also not a bad thing to do right before bedtime because it calms your body and your brain in order to get into a more peaceful state so that you can sleep well.

[00:25:15] Insight meditation, or vipassana, is really there to help give you more insight into what's going on. Observing your thoughts, observing your feelings, observing sensations that arise and pass, potentially observing what's going on around you. Even so, it builds on that calming piece and goes above and beyond it to start observing details of that experience in the present moment, including, you know, where do you feel an itch somewhere and what does that feel like without doing anything about it?

Do you have some emotions going on? How are you feeling that within your body? Is there extra strain in your neck? Are there knots in your stomach? It's going above and beyond just that pure calming technique to really notice and observe.

So this is going to help give you deeper understanding on your own stress levels and what's in the triggers, and not just the external triggers, but really the internal triggers, the feelings going on, the thoughts behind those, the beliefs behind those.

[00:26:34] The key differences between an insight meditation and a calming meditation is a calming meditation is really there to help you quickly focus inward so that you can calm down, while an insight meditation is going to direct your focus more fully to observe details, to observe what's being experienced not just inwardly, but also what's causing them outwardly and internally.

10 Different Ways To Meditate

[00:27:03] Let's get into the 10 ways to start meditating.

And again, these are tools within your toolbox. So we're going to go through each one, and we're going to give some examples of when you could use it, and then you can utilize them as you see fit.

#1: Simple Breath Meditation

So number one is a simple breath meditation, the easiest one to use anywhere. I tell my clients to start here because it is the easiest way. And breath meditation is really focusing on your breath, noticing how you're breathing, and then maybe counting your breathing in/out.

One thing I would note about meditation is that anytime you're breathing within a meditative state, and frankly, anytime you're trying to stop a stress response, you want to ensure that you are breathing out for a longer time period than you're breathing in. So, stress breathing is when you breathe in more than you breathe out. Think about what happens when you're exercising. We're gasping for air longer than the exhalation. Well, you want to flip that around to stop the stress response. And meditative breathing and any mindfulness activity that uses breath work, you want to ensure you've flipped that.

So number one, any type of breath meditation means that you're doing that and you want to - you can do it as simply as count to 10. So one inhale, one exhale, and that would be one, and then a second, and then a third, and then a fourth, up to five or 10.

[00:28:38] This has the benefit of just stopping that stress response so that you can help calm down, think more rationally, and refocus.

Now, I will tell you, doing that to a count of ten. If you're counting in and out as just one actually takes work. So you're focusing on your breath, you're going to notice probably by the time you're at four or five that your mind has wandered. And again, that's okay. Part of this whole thing is noting and then bringing it back, and you just start off, start back where you left off. Now, if you don't remember where you were, but you remember you got to at least three, but you think you were past it, start with four. That's okay. Again, this is a practice. This is not about perfection.

[00:29:21] Another way to use simple breath meditation, and this is especially, I think, helpful for those of us who really don't love that our mind is wandering. And let's say our mind is just wandering more than usual, or we have a lot of mind wandering going on right now.

Try out what's called the 4-7-8 technique. So the 4-7-8 technique is when you breathe in for a count of four, you hold your breath for a count of seven, and you breathe out for a count of eight. And something about that holding of the breath and having to count so much really helps the mind wandering. So if you're really just trying to focus immediately and you don't want your mind to wander, try the 4-7-8 technique.

Now, a simple breath meditation.

[00:30:05] You can focus in on your breath. You can also focus in on something that you're looking at. So let's say you have a window in front of you and there's a flower that you've noticed or a bush, or a tree. You can just focus your mind on that and just breathe. I do find, I will say that if you're not counting in some way, shape, or form, your mind is going to wander more often until you get used to it. So beware if you try that technique. But the best way to utilize a simple breath meditation is (a) when getting started and just trying to get comfortable with any type of meditation, and (b) this is a great tool in your toolbox for when the client calls with an emergency that's unexpected and is going to completely take out your day. For when you walk into a meeting and somebody drops a bomb in the middle of it, and everybody is just like, you know, chaotic, and you start to get into that stress response. Well, utilize a simple breath meditation to stop that stress response, refocus and move forward with more clarity and calm.

#2: Body Scan Meditation

[00:31:11] All right. The second meditation type is called a body scan.

So a lot of times our body's doing all kinds of things that we're not even all that cognizant of because our mind is all over the place. So this technique is designed to sync up your body with your mind by performing a mental scan from the top of the head to the end of your toes.

So you're going to imagine the top of your head and then scan slowly, move down and just notice as you move down, and I would say a good 3 to 5 to 10 seconds even on each moment. So top of the head, forehead, nose, mouth, front of the neck, back of the neck, shoulders, chest, belly, back. And then you go down your arms if you want, each arm, and then down each leg individually. That's a body scan.

[00:32:15] And you're going to notice as you move through, discomfort sensations, muscles that might be tense, right? Body aches, itches. Maybe that's the discomfort. Maybe you have an itch. Maybe you're a little cold in an area, maybe you feel your left foot feels cold. That's a body scan. And that can be really helpful to kind of just also take that amygdala stress response down.

 It is best utilized, I have found, when you're alone, not in the office, but at home, when you can lay down and really go through this. And I will tell you, it is probably one of my favorite things for winding down after a really long, difficult day and preparing my body and mind for bed.

When I do a body scan, as one of the last things, it really helps me get to sleep quickly, and it helps me to have a good night's sleep. So highly recommend that you try it. You can do this on your own, but there are some really amazing apps out there and also places where you can find good body scans. There's one that is one of my absolute favorites. I will put the one that is my favorite to utilize into the show notes so you can go find it yourself.

#3: Movement Meditation

[00:33:34] All right, so that is a body scan. The third one is movement meditation. And I find that a lot of people don't realize how certain types of movement can be very meditative.

So yoga is one that comes to mind. Obviously, yoga is a form of movement meditation for most of us, if you're doing it right. Because a lot of times yoga, we're doing slower movements where we then stay in a pose for a length of time. And while we're doing that, we're breathing along with it in a certain way. So that is a form of meditation. If you do yoga and you're doing it that way, you are actually meditating. So lean into that a little bit more and really breathe through it. Even better.

[00:34:22] Another way for movement meditation that I highly recommend to my clients is mindful walking. I recommend this because we don't get outside enough, we don't get into nature enough. We're in offices, we're in our homes, we're doing things. And then we also, when we get outside, we're often, we put earbuds in, we listen to stuff. No, I want you, the next time you get outside, to just take a 5 to 10 minute walk on your own - by yourself.

[00:34:50] And then start by noticing just how it feels when you're moving along. What does your body feel like? Take a minute or two to just notice.Kind of like in the body scan, you're noticing your body, you're becoming more self-aware of the sensations as you're walking. Then pay more attention to how the ground feels below your feet. Okay, so you're using the sense of movement of your body, like feel, touch, throughout this movement that you're doing in mindful walking. And then you can utilize your other senses.

And I like to go through each sense because I get bored if I don't. Then you can pick your ears and what do you hear for a couple of minutes, and then your eyes and what do you see? So that is a form of meditation that I have found, doing that at least a couple of times a week really helps me to feel more grounded and rooted. And I do think we're losing something socially these days in not getting out in nature and not feeling rooted to our environment and our surroundings. Doing something like that, it makes you feel more grounded and rooted in your environment. So try some movement meditation.

I would also note that you can utilize movement meditation with all kinds of exercise. Things that are done on your own more quietly and involve repetition. So walking, swimming, biking, Tai chi, yoga can be a form, as we already mentioned, all of that can be utilized as a form of movement meditation.

So if you're one of those people who likes to be more active, this is a great way to get started.

[00:36:36] And I find movement meditation to especially be helpful when you are in the midst of a lot of chaos and you just need to get away and be on your own. Get out and walk, do some mindful walking, go do some yoga, go ride a bike, if that's what you'd prefer to do, go for a swim and then focus your mind on concentrating on your movement and the feelings within your body as you're doing these things, it's amazing.

It's not just calming. I find it energizing, too.

#4: Progressive Relaxation

[00:37:11] The next one is called progressive relaxation. And this is basically where you tighten and then loosen various muscles within your body. And I like to think of this as a progression of the body scan, because what you're really doing is you're not doing them all at once. You're kind of moving top down or down to the top through different muscles within your body, and you're squeezing them and letting them hold for a couple of seconds and then slowly releasing them.

This is an incredibly relaxing way. And I also find that it's a great way before bedtime. Just like the body scan. I kind of think of this as an extension of the body scan. It's also really great for those of us who tend to put tension in the shoulders. I have found that when you utilize this a lot, you can actually learn how to, like, loosen your muscles a little bit just through the act of progressive muscle relaxation, which is kind of cool.

#5: Mantra Meditation

[00:38:15] The next one we're going to get into is called a mantra meditation. So this type of meditation uses a sound that's repetitive or even a phrase or a word. So it doesn't have to be. It can be just about anything.

Your mantra can be spoken loudly or quietly. Typically, it is spoken. I know some say, well, you can say it in your mind, but I don't think it has the same impact. Because part of the impact of a mantra meditation is the sound itself and the feeling of that sound within your throat and your body as you continually say it over and over and over again.

So, typically, you want to chant your mantra, but it can be loud or quiet. It doesn't have to be really loud. It can be done very quietly. The people who enjoy mantra meditation the most tend to be those who find it easier to focus, and it helps them with mind wandering. So when you are forced to continually say something over and over again, this can really help with not allowing the mind to wander so much. And it's also really good for people who don't like silence and want to not just be sitting in silence, and would prefer not to have a guided meditation as well. So that's. If that's you, I would encourage you to try mantra meditation.

[00:39:42] I find that this is best when done any time of day, but at home, not so much at at work. People might look at you funny if you try a mantra meditation, but it is not my favorite. I will just be honest. I have tried it a couple of times. I actually one of those times found it very helpful when I was in a higher stress response state. I think my mind was wandering more. And so I tried a mantra meditation at the time.

It really did help with that. So it is in my toolbox. It is something that I can utilize and have utilized. Yet not my favorite. Again, this is why we're going over all of these because I think that everybody. To each their own. Okay, so that's mantra meditation.

#6: Visualization

The next one we're going to cover is called visualization.

[00:40:31] So visualization is basically where you paint a picture inside of your mind, and instead of focusing in on your breath or something in front of you, you're replacing your focal point with the mental image that you're creating.

Now. I will say I think this one can be very challenging for some people, especially if you're trying to do it on your own. You will find that there are plenty of visualization-guided meditations out there. I enjoy visualization meditations upon occasion, if they are guided. I am not good at doing these on my own.

And this is often, you know, this is where you will visualize things like walking on a path through the forest or walking down a beach with the waves lapping at your feet. That kind of thing.

I have personally found this type of meditation to be incredibly helpful when I am going through a lengthy time period where things are going to be more stressful, more chaotic, more crazy. I started doing visualizations back when I was still practicing law, and I found them most helpful for me towards the end of the calendar year because I was a finance attorney and things were pretty crazy busy from October through the end of the year, and especially November. December were chaotically crazy. Longer nights, more weekend work. It just was what it was. It was our busy period. Well, during that period I found visualization to be very helpful. And I think one of the reasons I did is because it forced me to kind of put myself into a different situation and really see things differently and feel more connected to nature even when I wasn't able to be in it as much at that time.

And yes, I did go walking when I could and all of the things, but sometimes you just can't as much. You know, sometimes you're getting up and leaving at 6 in the morning and you're back at 10 at night and you're not in the mood to go walking at 10 at night or at 5:30 in the morning because you're tired. So visualization worked really well for me during those times.

[00:42:33] It does take a little longer. Usually it's hard to do a good visualization and under 5 minutes. You can. But I find the best visualization meditations that I've done, are five to 10 minutes, sometimes a little longer in length. So just note that I think also this worked so well for me during that time period because I didn't have a lot of time for self care on certain days. And so I did this, as I could always find 10 minutes of time to just give myself this gift. And it very much helped me. So hopefully that will give you some ideas on how you might be able to utilize visualization for yourself.

#7: Sound Bath Meditation

[00:43:12] Okay, so the next meditation is one that I am just starting to get into. I've never done it until recently. I've done it now a couple of times because a fellow coach is doing this, and she was talking about it on LinkedIn. It just sounded so beautiful. I had to try it. And I gotta say, I'm kind of falling in love. And that is called a sound bath meditation.

So a sound bath meditation is where you lie down or sit very comfortably. Often you close your eyes. Usually you do close your eyes because it works better this way. And you just listen to resonant sounds of instruments. So gongs, chimes, and sometimes singing bowls. It is incredibly relaxing - that sound and the vibration of the sound, especially if you can do it in person. There are places you can go that do these things in person.

[00:44:08] Really induces relaxation, really promotes that mindfulness state and helps you to focus in on other things as well, where you can combine other meditations in there. But the whole point of it initially is to calm the nervous system and help you just feel more relaxed. And I have found the sound definitely does that.

Now, as I mentioned before, you can go in person. There are a lot of benefits to doing this in person because oftentimes not only are you hearing it, but those vibrations can kind of be felt. And there's a lot to that. But you can also find a lot of sound meditations online. There's plenty of them out there, and some of the apps I mentioned I think, have some of those on them. So I highly recommend you try this out because I have found this to be super relaxing for me.

I have found that these are my favorite things if I need a power nap. So sometimes on the weekends, I'm just tired, it's been a long week and I need a power nap. And a sound meditation can really help get me into that relaxed state very quickly. And then I will Take a nap. So I might do a 10 minute, you know, maybe set my alarm for 25 minutes and do an 8 to 10 minute sound meditation at the beginning. By the time the sound meditation's over, I'm asleep. My alarm goes off at the right time. I've had the perfect power nap and I feel amazingly refreshed.

So there's a lot of ways in which you can use sound meditation. You don't have to do it that way, but that is how I use it to give you some ideas. And I will put one or two of my favorites and maybe some places that to go for more sound meditations as well into the show notes so that you can find some of your own.

#8: Focused Meditation

Okay, so the next one is called a focused meditation.

[00:45:53] And so a focused meditation involves concentrating on something using one of the five senses. So for example, you can focus on your breath. A pure breath meditation would be a form of focus meditation. But I want you to think of it a little bit differently here.

Bring something in external to help you focus your attention on. So maybe it's listening to like a chime that's going off or staring at a candle flame or watching the moon and focusing in on that, or focusing in on a flower and really paying attention to something about that flower and the petals on the flower. Or maybe it's counting beads, right? So we, we sometimes have those bracelets that our kids make for us, counting the beads and just going on and on and on all the way through again and again.

[00:46:49] That counts as a focused meditation.

One of the things that I would note about this type of meditation is that your mind is probably going to wander more unless you're counting. I have noticed that counting can be helpful when you do like beads or something. But when you're just focusing in on something and looking at it and paying attention to it, just like a breath meditation. And in fact more so than a breath meditation because usually we're counting breath breathing in some way, shape or form.

[00:47:16] It can be a lot harder to do. But this is one of those things that can really help with being present and more grounded and more focused and understanding more when your mind has wandered and bringing it back. So I wouldn't say don't do these, but maybe it's not the first thing you start with, or if it is, go for a minute and build up from there. One of the things I will note is you can count just about anything. I have used focus meditations when I'm in the middle of meetings with people who are grating, and there's a lot of arguing, and they're just not listening. And you have a moment where you're like, they're just going on. And I don't even need to be here at this point. But you gotta be there.

We all know we've had those moments, right? Well, sometimes I will look for, let's say there's tiles in the ceiling or there's tiles on the floor or something that has like, you know, like four sides. I'll count four, eight, 12. That can be a form of focused meditation. And I have found doing something like that and counting something that's there's a pattern to when in the midst of chaos can help, again, stop the stress response, especially if you're breathing carefully through your nose. In and out, out, out. A little, you know, longer of an in that can help you, like, calm that amygdala down and regain composure so that you can think more creatively and find a way out of the chaos. So just a note around different ways to use a more focused meditation.

#9: Reflection Meditation

[00:48:47] All right, two more, y'all. So the next one is called a reflection meditation. So a reflection meditation is when you ask yourself a question.

So, what am I most grateful for? What am I most looking forward to? And you get. You start to notice what comes up for this. Okay, now a couple of notes around how to do this properly. You want to ask yourself a question using the second person.

Heather, what are you most grateful for today? What are you most looking forward to today? What challenge are you most up for today?

You discourage your mind, that negative nelly mind, from trying to answer it too quickly, too rationally and move on. Your point is to sit there with the question and really, truly reflect on it.

I have found that reflective meditations for me are best done through guided meditations. There are some really good guided meditations out there to help you with the reflections, to help you to kind of look forward.

[00:50:06] Also, there are reflective meditations that helps you to look back. So it's also a good type of meditation to utilize towards the end of the day or at the end of the week where you're looking back at your day or week and you're. You're looking at, okay, what happened and how do I feel and what do I learn from this?

So the point of this style of meditation, yes, it brings in more self-awareness. It helps you to see more fully what your feelings and thoughts are around things that have happened or are going on in your life or things that you're planning for. But it also then helps you to reflect more fully upon them and then see the opportunities within them so that you can move forward with the lessons that you're learning from these experiences. So that is the real value in a reflection meditation.

I highly recommend you start, if this is something that you're interested in, with some guided meditations in this area. And I will find a couple to put into the show notes for you to get started with.

#10: Resting Awareness Meditation

[00:51:13] All right, finally, last but not least, the last one is called resting awareness.

So resting awareness is instead of focusing in, instead of visualizing something, instead of asking and answering a question. It's basically letting the mind just be. So thoughts are going to come, weird things may come to mind, things will bubble up to the surface, and that's okay.

You just allow them to happen, notice them as they happen, and you're really present in the moment of what's going on in your head, and you allow them to kind of drift away as new things come up.

[00:51:56] I have found this to be one of the most impactful meditative practices for those of us who are overly busy, feel a bit chaotic, feel frazzled, feel like a lot is going on in our head and there's no space. So you provide that, that space to yourself. My number one tip is to try 10 minutes and if you really have trouble with 10 minutes, go with five. You will be surprised how fast that time goes.

I also recommend when you first get started at this keeping a notebook, journal, piece of paper, something nearby and a pen and anything that comes to mind that you feel like, wow, that's important, you just jot it down and then you move forward.

[00:52:40] This is one of my self-care pieces in my self-care challenge. By the way. I used to do a. Oh gosh, I can't remember even if it's a seven-day or a 10-day, I think it might be a 10-day self-care challenge where I give you one thing to do every single day, and this is one of those things. And the whole point of the self-care challenge is to really change how you think of self-care.

Because there are a lot of ways to take care of yourself, no matter how busy you are. And I think sometimes we do things that can be self-care, but we don't even perceive them that way. So the point of the challenge is to help flip your perception of what self-care even is and then double down on really taking care of yourself as best as you can, no matter what's going on in your life, no matter what's going on at work.

And this is one of those things because guess what? Everybody can find five or 10 minutes.

And frankly, a lot of times I find that lawyers are so busy that we just don't give ourselves any space to think. And I hear that a lot. I have no space. I don't even have space to think for five minutes about something. Well, give yourself that space.

Provide it to yourself. This can be an incredibly impactful meditation. It is something that I go to again and again when life gets busier. It is something I recommend with my clients a lot, and I've seen it it be incredibly impactful for all of us. So it'sone of my favorites, especially for those of you just getting started, because it allows your mind to just wander. It's okay, that's part of the point. You just notice where it's going, and that's it. That's the whole point of the meditation that you're doing.

[00:54:21] All right, couple of final notes.

I hope this gave you plenty to get started with. I hope that you at least start thinking of meditation as a tool within your toolbox and that it's not just one way. I hope that you've learned that there is no right or wrong way. There are many different ways in which to meditate, play around with them, try them out, have fun.

[00:54:45] And I'm going to note this. I have not offered my self care challenge in a long time. It is rather old, but I am going to bring it back because I've mentioned it today. So, for those of you who would be interested in a ten-day simple self-care challenge to really change how you think of self-care to enable you to start creating very simple habits that you can fit into your everyday life, no matter how busy it is. I challenge you to go sign up. It only takes 10 days. It is designed to be done in 10 to 15 minutes each day. You just open an email every morning and you do the thing or you identify when you're going to do the thing. And none of those things are going to be a lot of work or a lot of time, just FYI.

So go sign up for it. I will include that in the show notes as well. And if you do join, just to note, you will also be joining my newsletter. So after the challenge finishes, you will get my weekly newsletter. If you're already in my newsletter and you want to sign up for the challenge, you can still do that. It won't change anything for you. All right, that is it for this week. I hope that you enjoyed today's podcast because I was really excited to bring it to you. Bye for now.